The Rebuttal

You loved me…in your “unique” way

I was okay with that

For a long, long while…too long

Until it just hurt too much

Too much to keep loving you, forgiving you, missing you

You were merely a ghost from the past

An illusion of what I wanted

I was the person you always needed

Devoted, accepting, there

While you were incapable of being the person I needed

A friend, a confidant, a soul mate

It shouldn’t have been so difficult to ask of you

Not from you…never from you

But it was, truly was

You pushed me away, kept your arms at length, never letting yourself be close

I pleaded for your attention, to no avail

Left too many times to wait…and wonder

Humiliated to realize my desperation; to see myself so blatantly rejected

I ran away in pure shame…

Silence was my weapon, and I wielded it with power; power I did not know I had

I grieved the loss of my child-like fantasy

Untying the ribbons of my attachment

Seeing clearly what was never there

But do not mistake my devotion to what could have been

My heart is always and forever, eternally connected to you